A Lover AND a Fighter

All children are different.  They are people, not cut-outs from a factory.  They get their "labels," because of the things that make them stand out.  Especially in a family unit.  There are the good labels like: 

The smart one.

The sweet one. 

The funny one. 

The lovable one.

The talented one.

The coordinated one.

Then, there are the not-so-nice labels.  As parents we never want to say things like, "Why can't you ______ like your sibling?"  As a matter-of-fact, many of us make die-hard vows to ourselves to never utter such words.  We may think it in our heads, but we try our hardest not to allow such words to part from our lips.  We know we can't take those words back, and quite possibly those words could scar our children for life.  Or something like that.

This brings me to the subject of sleeping.

With my first two children, truly I thought that I had discovered some super-secret to getting my children to sleep through the night.  Really, it was simple.  I needed to tell everyone, because surely it would solve all of their children's sleeping issues as well.  I read it all in a book, and it worked.  I had uncovered some amazing secret that truly helped children to sleep through the night.  For my first two children... 

Then, came my third child: The rule-breaker to my little system, which I thought had been perfected like a well-oiled machine. Lovable as he was, he fought sleep.  I wanted to burn that wretched book that had made me a self-proclaimed "expert" on getting my first two children to sleep. My son fought sleep from the very beginning, and he still fights it now- four years later.  

Don't get me wrong: He is lover. Sweet, endearing, lovable, and more.

But, it would be dishonest for me to not tell you that with everything within him when it comes to sleep: 

He is a fighter.

I won't bore you with the lists of things that my husband and I tried to do to train our son to sleep, but it was not pretty.  Even when we found his intolerance to certain foods, there was not a simple fix for his sleeping issues.  

For the first 19 months, he did not sleep more than two hours in a row during the night.  This was a very humbling experience in my life.  One expects to be sleep deprived for the first few months of a baby's life, but even in my wildest dreams I could not imagine that it would take 19 months for my son to "sleep through the night" especially since I couldn't even get him to sleep during the day.  And, by "sleep through the night," I mean sleep five hours in a row.  It wouldn't be until he was 2 years-old that he and I would get a full 10-12 hours of sleep at night.  And, day time naps... Well, let's just say that when he has ever taken a 2 hour nap, it is rare and usually turns out that he is sick. 

In my head, I like to think that the reason he doesn't sleep well is because he's so smart.  Yes.  That's it. ;)  It's true that when he was a little over a year old, I asked him (jokingly,) "Are you a genius?"  and instead of repeating me he said, "I'm a genius!"  Then, he would randomly repeat that phrase to strangers for many, many months, because he does have an amazing memory.  Very impressive, but still no cause to think that he actually is a genius. 

And, even if he is, I am resolved: 

Geniuses still need their sleep.  

We have transitioned him finally to his "big boy bed."  Now, you may think that at age 4 it is a little old to have still been in a crib, but you must remember that he didn't get much use out of that crib for the first 19 months. Plus, my husband and I don't make tall children. Really.  It's true. Height does not run in our family, and it makes pregnancy much easier. ;) I knew that breaking his ever-so-delicate routine of sleep by moving him to his new bed would cause much grief for me and untold times of sleeplessness for both of us. It would be a new kind of frustration as he is older and still fighting sleep, and I am pregnant and need my sleep.  I was not happy about making this transition, but alas it needed to be done.  After all, his baby sister is due to arrive in a few months, and it is my genuine hope that she is not a rule-breaker like her older brother when it comes to this precious area of sleep.

But, the truth is that I am a fighter, too. 

I will fight for him to sleep.  It is challenging, but I will fight for him to sleep because he needs it to grow healthy and strong.  

I fight for his sleep, because I am a lover.  

I love my sleep.

   (Oh, and I love my little boy, too. :) )

~Michelle

P.S. If he is indeed a genius and does something truly amazing with his life, it is my dream that he gets me an amazing bed.  That is, after he buys himself an amazing bed, because geniuses need their sleep, too. :)