Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Homeschooling Smarty Pants Mama

OK, so first, a confession: I have never actually read Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  I'm just good at faking cultural/literary references.  For this very useful skill I would like to thank my mom and my dad for completely sheltering me as I grew up in rural Pennsylvania (which I like to call HEAVEN!!!! every chance I get) while at the same time letting me read pretty much anything that was in our house.  Which was a lot.  And of an odd variety.  However, I never got to Dr. Jekyll.  Probably because I was too busy trying to finish the unabridged version of War and Peace before I graduated from middle school.  Or maybe it was Anna Karenina.  Yep, I'm bragging.  Or sounding pathetic.  Whichever.

Anyway.  I took issue w/ my wonderful friend Michelle's recent lament and thought what could be more fun than stirring up some strife, smackdown, trash talk reasoned debate on the blog.  :)  It should be very clear to our blog readers that ONE of us here on the blog does not like summer.  I am frequently mocked and maligned for this point of view, but I will say it again: summer is hot, chaotic, busy, you sweat a lot, and you wear less clothing.  None of this is good by itself and put together it is just torture.  This does not mean that settling down and looking forward to fall is the mature thing to do, however!!  No!!!  It should also be very clear that I have no more claim to maturity than the other 2 crazy moms who are part of this . . . oh wait, that doesn't sound quite right . . . hmmmmm . .  . umm, never mind.

Let me get back to my point.  Yes, I have one. 

This seems to be the time of year when my homeschooling friends in particular are falling into two categories.  (Note that I am carefully not saying which is Dr. Jekyll and which is Mr. Hyde.)  There are the people who are pining after summer even before it's left.  They are saying things like "But I don't WANNA be a grown up and start up school w/ my kids!"  "Summer is so much fun, I just want to punch fall in the throat!"  And my favourite, "I need more ice cream and homemade hot fudge sauce!"  They are checking Target for stretchy pants and tossing their jeans into the back of the closet.  I'm not calling anybody out here.  If the stretchy pants fit, than you know who you are.

Then there is the opposite camp.  These people are cleaning and organizing and selling old curriculum and holding yard sales of outgrown clothing and homemade aprons their children have hand knitted while memorizing the book of Revelation and planning and planning and TALKING about planning their school year.  Every school planner/school curriculum/kid chore system on the market place is discussed and the many ways to use them.  They wonder aloud if they are doing enough or committing the cardinal sin of overscheduling.  Perhaps they dust off their copy of Confessions of an Organized Housewife and peruse it as a refresher.  Or perhaps they give it to a friend.  (Note that I am carefully not admitting to owning this book and am definitely not outing any possible friend who might or might not have been on the receiving end of my generousity.)  They are probably excusing this behaviour by calling themselves geeks.  Or smart.  Once again, not calling anybody out here!  Just, look down next to your computer and see if there is a homemade school planner there.  Then take step #1 and admit you have a problem.

I freely admit that I drank the Planning Potion.  For 3 weeks or more in August, I was determined to finally get my school planning done RIGHT.  I bought a homeschool planner, started studying the directions, and came to find out that I was supposed to spend a day praying about my homeschool year before I continued on w/ my school planning.  OK, great!, I can do that.  The day after I decided to do that I lost the planner.  (Well, actually my husband lost it, just to keep the debate around my house lively.)  Prayer did NOT help at that point.  So then I rushed around (most of the rushing looked like me sitting on the couch and staring into space w/ a concentrated frown on my face) and tried to make my own planner.  I couldn't even figure out how to get past Monday, 10AM.  I had 1) Devotional w/ kids, 2) Math with .  . .?  I mean, there are FOUR kids running around my house.  I'm not even sure if all of them eat breakfast every day.

Finally, enough was enough.  I mean, three weeks of this?  My sanity was at stake.  One of my sisters said I should stop waiting until I got my plan perfected (clearly she was not aware of how close I was), and just get started.  So, since I use a very easy, scripted (that means a book tells me what to say) writing program, I started doing that with at least 2 kids each day.  No, I wasn't Susan Wise Bauer yet, but I was on the road.  Back in the game.  Finding my groove.  Yee haw!

Then I stole a bright pink binder from my daughter (just in case my husband helped me organize again).  And I wrote down all of the subjects that each of my kids needed to do.  This sounds like a no-brainer, but I would always forget SOMETHING.  Until 11 that night, at which point I would say something like "Rats, I forgot to make the kids do math today!"  Although I would often choose to say that silently in my own head, since I don't like to "debate" with my husband all *that* frequently.  And then I would lie awake all night worrying about how I was failing my kids and myself and that Susan Wise Bauer would kick me off the Well-Trained Mind forum.  (wait, is this tmi?  and is it more or less pathetic than the Tolstoy brag?) 

I divided the subjects for my 2 oldest with a fancy slanted line because my goal is to do skill subjects like math and language arts in the morning and content subjects like history and science in the afternoon.  (Sounds intellectual, doesn't it? I copied it from somebody else.  Yes, she's on the Well-Trained Mind forum.)  I put this fancy paper with my super crafty color-coded writing into the front of my binder, along with a pocket for my color-coded pens.  If you look carefully, you will see that I had to list things for my 4yo like puzzles and games because when faced w/ a little-person-demand to watch tv I would say something brilliant like "ummmmmm, uhhhhh, No. You can, ummmmm . . ." and then I would forget that I was in the middle of a conversation and wander off in a fog and he would take a screwdriver and conduct an experiment to validate his hypothesis on the structure and stress analysis of drywall and then I would wander back in to find him standing next to some new holes in my living room wall and I would get all mad and scold and threaten and then be all "YES you can go watch Little Einsteins.  Just be quiet!!  And no more holes in the drywall!!!"

Not impressed by my homeschooling genius yet?  Well, I use Sonlight Curriculum for my history and literature, and my next breakaway from my planning paralysis was when I discovered they have simple blank schedule pages in the back of their Instructor's Guide for me to copy.  So I copied a bunch and put them in my binder, along with a yellow sticky note that reminds me of the extra books I want to read with my kids while they bicker eat lunch.  I'm a bit of a book-a-holic, and I was forgetting to read all of these great books I have sitting on my shelf just waiting for lunchtime! 

So now, each week I fill out what I have to accomplish.  Not necessarily page numbers or specific books to read, but just the general, make sure you do math every day kind of stuff.  Although I have started making little notes to myself about page numbers where we stopped, or the book we just finished.

Simple.  Not super-planned.  But I love it.

I'm getting school done.  Spending time with 4 of my favourite people in the world and seeing them once again as People and not Subjects Who Will Not Fit Into My Plan(ner).  I'm not any more mature or organized than I was when it was still technically summer.  But I feel like I've found the happy medium between Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Homeschooling Smarty Pants Mama.  I need to think of a different literary reference.

I know!! I've become Anna Karenin.  Can I break free from the torment of loving my homeschooling, clutter-filled life?  Can I reconcile with the strict expectations of an organized home?  Will I throw myself in front of the train or not?

It might look like it is just a very cluttered desk.  But it's a train.  Trust me.  Stay tuned.

~Stephanie



Top Ten Reasons Why I'm Glad Summer's Ending

Sunset in the Florida Keys while on a 14 yr. anniversary date with my hubby

As the sun sets on summer <sigh> I now must make my list about why it is so lovely that it is all coming to an end....<ahem>

Top Ten Reasons Why I'm Glad Summer's Ending

10. It won't be so hot. 

(Nevermind... we live in NJ & it could be hot until November...)

9.The kids can't wait to start school. 

Um... no, they can wait...

8.There are so many yummy Fall foods to look forward to. 

Oh wait... then, I will gain some more 

unnecessary pregnancy pounds...

<sigh> So, it's settled.  I can not go on with this list.

I'm really sad that summer is ending. 

Really.

Top Ten Reason Why I'm Sad Summer's Ending

10. I really do love the summer even if it is hot. 

9. My house is cleanest in the summer, so it only goes downhill from here.

8. I have to spend less time reading "fun" books like 

"The Hunger Games" and spend more time reading... curriculum.

7. I have to start nesting again, because the baby needs a bedroom.

6. I have SO much work to do with my business, home, school, and church.

5. My schedule is about to intensify. 

4. I'm at the point in the pregnancy where I'm remembering how little sleep I have left before I embark on the journey of endless sleeplessness for an undetermined amount of time. 

3. Though I am passionate about home educating my children and my children generally like homeschool, the thought of school beginning is still not a fun thought right after we've returned from a fantastic, relaxing vacation.

2. I will be gaining more weight over the next few weeks from delicious Fall foods that I love, and the pounds might take a while to come off.

1. The baby- though we might have atleast narrowed it down- still remains nameless until my husband and I can come to an agreement.

Really, when I think about it,

I'm just lamenting that I have to be a grown-up after returning from such a relaxing, worry-free vacation. 

I like being a grown-up... sometimes...maybe... 

Just not when the summer is ending...:)

My hubby and littlest guy fishing on vacation.

~Michelle

The Summer Spin Cycle

OK, has anybody figured out yet that I am not the biggest fan of summer?  I sweat a lot, and don't like to sweat, so there's that.  There are crazy levels of activities, and I am a homebody.  But I do have a love/hate relationship with one part of summer: home canning.

I realize I might be speaking a foreign language right now to some of you.  But I grew up in rural Pennsylvania (HEAVEN! as I like to call it) in what was in many ways an old-fashioned way to grow up.  Plus, it apparently was a Long, Long Time Ago, since my 10yo thinks I was born before women could vote.  (Yeah, I'm not letting that go any time soon.)  So I grew up helping my mom make jam and jelly and canning green beans and peaches and pears and pretty much any fruit we wanted to eat over the winter.  I also grew up with an extremely frugal mom who thought fresh fruit was too expensive to buy in the winter.  Sigh.  Anyway.

So this is how I view summer:
end of May: Strawberry Season.  Get busy because it comes earlier in south Jersey and I'm still trying to do school w/ the kids.  But wait, south Jersey strawberries aren't that great so I need to make at least one trip up to PA to get some yummy, small, mouth-wateringly tasty strawberries from the Amish/Mennonite farmers who live around my Grandma.  Then go home and start making jam.  This year: 4 batches, 2 in which I forgot to add pectin, which is what makes your jam and jelly set, meaning I have 2 batches of strawberry syrup and 2 batches of jam.  Oh well.  Any child that complains WILL be given an extra chore to do.  So there.



It doesn't look like enough for a year, does it?  Hmmmm . . .

June: the crazy rush of berries.  This year I found a place close by where we could pick black raspberries.  This is a rare find in south Jersey.  (Heaven has them growing wild everywhere.)  So we spent time picking raspberries and making raspberry jam and jelly.  This year: 1 batch of black raspberry jam (that means w/ the seeds), 2 batches of red raspberry/black raspberry jelly.  At this point in the summer my daughter started signing her name as "Stirrer, Spreader and Consumer of M.A.D. (Mother and Daughter) Jam, Inc. - that's the company that's incorporated not the jam."  I sure do love that funny girl!

Also in June, going through July: blueberries.  My husband went vegan about a year ago.  All of the kids consider frozen blueberries w/ a little bit of milk poured over them a big treat.  Last year I froze 40 pounds and we ran out in December.  So, starting in mid-June, I bought one 20 pound box a week and washed and froze them.  Ideally I would like to pick (or buy) organic ones in bulk, but I'm in get-'er-done mode, and it's more important to me just to get tasty fruit that is better than what I can get in the grocery store in the middle of winter.  This year I believe I got 100 pounds, but I did give some away to my dad and my grandma, so probably I only have 80 pounds left in my freezer.

This is only a small part of the 80lbs.  It was hard
to find room for them, what with all the ice cream.

Also in June, going through July and August: my husband's garden starts producing zucchini.  He grates this and puts it in quart bags in the freezer.  SUCH a huge blessing in the middle of winter when I make zucchini-carrot quiche.  Seems a bit of a trial in the middle of summer when I'm busy with other things.  :)

60 quart bags - about as exciting to look at
in person as they are in the photo.  ;)

Then, August.  The Spin Cycle has me in its grip.  It is that crazy, last, flying burst of activity that won't stop until September hangs me up to dry.  Peaches. Tomatoes. Canning.  We have a gas stove-top and our gas bill doubles this month.  It is worth every penny, though!  This food is far tastier than anything we get in the grocery store.  It's not as cheap as the super-cheap, low-quality stuff you can buy w/ a zillion coupons, but this year we calculated the peaches are about 1/4 the price of the quality stuff that we buy.  So far we have 60 jars of peaches in the pantry, and plans for 20 more.  Tomatoes are coming on Monday.  Hello, heart-healthy tomato sauce.

Sunshine in a jar!

Have I mentioned that I look forward to September?

~Stephanie



Killers, Pools, "Naptime", and i wish i was 20 again.

Today's episode of, "Summer Joys" brought to you by Excedrin and marshmallows.

Hmm. Where to start.

Shall i begin this journey with the soda spill on the coffee table by my son, that was in turn, mopped up by the 18m old with pizza? Or the marshmallows, bitten in half and stuck to a wall in the kitchen. Or the 6yr old who "hears sounds" all the time, and will come screaming from other rooms, or refuse to go to sleep without being threatened. Or the pool that gets filled up for the kids, only to have them all come inside the house. Or the popsicle wrappers that no one left all over the place. Hello, ants. Or the nap that is really just 18m old screaming and throwing things out of her crib. No fear, she will fall asleep *JUST* when i was about to get her up, so we can go to the store. To buy a new hose....because i bought the hose last year, and in spite of my son saying, "Mom, seriously, we NEED a longer one than 20 feet", in my head, i was all, "pshhh....what do YOU know, you're 9", and bought the one that was 20 feet, and it only goes...well...20 feet. And apparently, though in my head our yard is supa-small, it's bigger than 20 feet. And if i want to keep the grass-rot-death-smell-Biblical plague of flies from happening, i have to keep strategically moving the pool around. But, because of my brilliant hose purchase, i can't. And i'm a little ticked because no one is even out in the pool that i just dumped, cleaned, moved, and refilled.

No one left this here.

Mickey CLEARLY did this.

Summer also brings me joys, like reading...reading books for ME-ME-MEEEE!!! Which, depending on what was given to me at Christmas or laying around, can range from frun Janet Evanovich books, to books by James Rollins, to my husbands favorite books by Ted Bell (ok, throwing this one out, any ladies out there notice that we will "give in" and read their books that they tell us are amazing, but they never-ever read ours?) to a nice, cozy tale of a serial killer that i can't put down. And now i am thinking i need to vary my daily routine, burn all our trash, carry a weapon, and get ADT. And never-ever trust someone in a cast who is all, "excuse me miss, can you help me with my groceries?". No. I can't. In fact, i am going to throw my groceries at you - hopefully it's a day when i bought alot of canned goods...because, apparently, i am living in the 1950's - and scream, "RUN" to my children.

You can pretend these are smart books that normal homeschool Mommies read. They are all about curriculum.

Summer also brings me MORE joys, i know, i know...MORE than what i just described? yes. Summer brings to me the magic, splendor, and wonder of wearing a swimsuit in public. Who doesn't love that. I didn't mind when i was 20. I even pulled it off after a few kids. Now...well, do i need to really say more than the fact that it is made by Spanx? And that is great. It's good to be sucked in. But sad that all this ain't gonna suck itself in anymore. Yeah, yeah, i had that "take time" post. I was bordering on being in great shape "for a mom of 5" a month or so ago. But then...then, the untimely death of motivation (you know, except for at night, after i ate everything, when i am like, "YEAH! tomorrow it's ON!").Whatever. NOW i have a Spanx swimsuit, and i keep eating ice cream and hamburgers, and the stitching in this swimsuit is screaming. If it goes...look out. Keep your kids and small dogs inside.

This was after i was all, "IF YOU DON'T GET IN THAT POOL"...

Peace out, Mammas:) ~Sue

Swimming Lessons

Ahhhhhh, summer.  Lazing by the pool.  Or wishing you were lazing by a pool.  Except once you are a mom, there is the terror that is instilled in you by little old ladies (and maybe your mother-in-law) coming up to you in grocery stores to say "Never take your eyes off of them near the water, dear.  It only takes a second for them to drown!  My cousin's aunt's best friend's neighbor lost not one BUT TWO of her children because one jumped in to save the other and they both died."  Yes, I have heard this kind of thing from multiple people, even someone I barely know calling me up out of the blue when she heard there was a small pond on our property.  Then there is that article circulating on facebook (and I have kept it going several times myself, YOU'RE WELCOME FRIENDS) called Drowning Doesn't Look Like Drowning, or some other equally sleep-preventing kind of title.

Anyway, I spent enough nights lying awake sobbing until my hair was soaked while my husband snored next to me as I imagined my kids drowning (see, Sue, you really need to use your imagination more when you lie awake sobbing!) that when my husband said the kids needed swim lessons, I was able to put aside my incredible cheapness and sit down and write out a check to the local pool.  For 3 kids.  Ouch.

Now.  When you sign 3 or more kids up for daily swimming lessons, you get the corner on the market on Crazy.  I did swimming lessons last year, but did I learn??  Nooooooooo.  This year I thought "hey, this is one thing Stefan was very emphatic about last year, and it wasn't that bad, and this time I won't schedule guitar lessons that are 40 minutes away for the time slot that is 30 minutes after swim lessons are over so it will all be ok."  (Yes, I really do talk to myself like that.  Don't judge.  I'm the only person who listens to me.)  Wait, I actually *did* learn that my then-11yo-daughter WILL cry in public when forced to take swim lessons, and that the people at my local pool feel no compunction about staring at her AND AT ME (what's that about?!?! She's the one crying, look at her!  I'm completely normal.) when she does that, so I at least was smart enough (or beaten enough) to not sign her up this year.

All seemed like it was going to go well until about 7pm on the first day of lessons.  That is when I remembered that there were lessons.  Or rather, had been lessons.  At 1030 that morning.

Sigh.

OK, so we regrouped, and we made it to the second day of lessons 5 minutes early.  My sweet, serious, kind-of-a-worrier 10yo can swim just fine, but I knew he would fuss like a toddler if he was slighted, so I signed him up for an advanced class.  He went off happily and can now swim better than I can.  I made the mistake of telling him so, and after his first flush of joy and pride, I could see him start to worry about me.  I might have to listen to a summer of swimming pointers now.

My 4yo is full of bounces, charm, smiles and daring. I was pretty sure swim lessons were going to be a breeze with him. What I wasn't prepared for, however, is that the instructors sometimes take their eyes off of my precious baby boy. Have they not read Drowning Doesn't Look Like Drowning?????  Yes, I was that mom that stood at the side of the pool prepared to dive in if need be.  For just one day, anyway.  I was gradually persuaded that my little guy would live if I sat down by the realization that, thanks to my husband's DNA, he's quite tall for his age, and as long as he remembers to put his feet down, will probably survive the occaisional moments of inattention from an otherwise very good group of swim instructors.  In fact, my bold little guy went down the huge slide into the deep pool TWICE at the graduation ceremony on the last day.  Yes, he was caught by an instructor, but those instructors let them go under before they catch them!  (Can you tell that my mama-heart is still beating a little fast over that?)  There was also the small issue of the hypothermia that the poor baby suffered from within 15 minutes of entering the water every day.  I mean, he was shivering so badly he couldn't even keep his hands clasped above his head when they had to show their "long arms"!  Driving home every day in 90+ degree heat with the heater blasting in the back seat did nothing to lower my crazy level, I can tell you.

Which leaves my 7yo.  Who looks like a born swimmer.  Really.  He looks like Michael Phelps.  His arms are gi-normous.  His elbows come above his head, for crying out loud.  He's solid muscle.  But therein lies at least part of the problem.  He is indeed SOLID.  And he seems to maybe possibly probably OK definitely lack the ability to do more than one thing at a time.  So last year, he was a full head taller than everybody in his swimming group, and the only one who looked like he was getting towed through the water sitting up when the instructors tried to get him to lie back on the water in preparation for learning the backstroke.  Every now and then the very patient instructors (who also apparently were devoid of a sense of humor since I never once saw them even cracking a smile at my weird child) were able to get my son to put his head back into the water.  And then, I kid you not, his legs would stick straight up into the air.  Even I, as his mother, was laughing.  And also wondering if I could just drop him off somehow so nobody would know I was w/ him.  ;)

OK, so, this year I was prepared.  I was not surprised that he was still in the same lesson group, only now he was with the kids who were infants last year.  (I mean, really, how are moms sending their itty-bitty babies into these dangerous places with limited oxygen under the supervision of strangers!?)  He was now a head, and shoulders, and a bit of torso above his classmates.  But he still possessed the same stubborn determination not to let the instructors drown him i.e. get his head wet that he did last year.  Those little kickboards that other children can hang onto and stay afloat while they kick?  Oh not my kid.  He NEEDED those instructors to keep a hold on him or he was going under.  Like a stone.  I consoled myself I was getting my money's worth in life preservation even if he wasn't learning to swim.

Then, on the second-to-last day, he came home and said in a very resigned voice, "Well, those people kept telling me to blow bubbles and put one side of face in the water and then the other, and I could tell they were just NOT going to be happy until I got my head wet, so I did it."

I admit it.  I laughed out loud.  Right in front of him.  And I was proud of him (and told him so).  A small step compared to my other kids - maybe most kids - but a big one for him.  And on the last day of class, when he actually got stretched out straight in the water horizontally and did about three kicks w/ a kickboard way out in front of him (instead of under him) and didn't go under, well, I went way past proud.  I'm amazed.  And hopeful that this newfound ability will stick w/ him until we go back for Round 2 next week.

So.  It turns out I'm not that crazy after all.  Or maybe I should say not yet.  Because I'm pretty sure they didn't really work on the backstroke this week.

~Stephanie